7/20/08

Let Me Tell You a Little Story About a Kitty Named "The Kitty"

It all started at the laundry mat. Yes, we have three washing machines at our house and not a one works properly. Mr. Bee brought a generator home to test out whether it was the washing machines or our electrical thingimajigs not functioning, because two of these washing machines were purported to work in rich people's homes and then not work upon their arrival to the vortex formerly known as our yard. Seriously, Mr. Bee keeps bringing home all these rich people's old cabinets too. If it weren't so embarrassing and I weren't afraid it would be sent into that Jeff Foxworthy hour thing with Larry the Cableguy and someone else would win $5,000 for my inconvenience, I would so post a pic to prove it, but like everything else on my blog, you'll just have to take my word for it. The point is that pretty soon I should be able to put everything we own in cabinets and then I'll hang our chairs on the wall and I can start getting a deposit from Snaggletooth that I will not return until he brings me back every single piece of the Simpson's Monopoly he likes to look at and imagine someone wants to play with him.

Anyway, I was at the laundry mat, for now overly explained reasons, and I loaded our laundry into the washers, to the attendant's chagrin as I arrived 40 minutes before closing time reassuring her that I wasn't going to dry my clothes there. Yes, I know it is infinitely easier to do so, but I am loathe to stay there more than is absolutely necessary and so I lug it all home wet and pay for the propane and electricity to dry it in many more loads instead. I pulled out my laptop and because I am an internet slut and, having picked up a signal there before, expected to be able to blog or some other such nonsense, but nooooo-go. Instead the attendant's ten year-old sister and I became friends. She was very friendly and we had a good conversation. We spoke my favorite language, Complementary Spanish. What is Complementary Spanish, you ask? It's what happens when a sparse Spanish speaker and sparse English speaker decide to communicate. For instance, Liddy was telling me something about her family, but she didn't know a certain word, but I understood what she meant, so I told learned her word and she learned mine. That is my favorite way to speak Spanish. For a whole year I worked in a kitchen at a nursing home near Fort Worth with a woman who only spoke a bit of English and we had to work together integrally. I think she was overwhelmed with having to speak English everywhere and took advantage of my wanting to learn Spanish more and we only spoke in Spanish, essentially. Unfortunately for her, and we talked quite a bit, I only knew present tense at the time, though my vocabulary was adequate, so everything was in el pasado+ ... or en el futuro+.... A couple years later when I went back to college, I took four semesters of Spanish and did learn other tenses, but have not had very good opportunities to practice.

So, on my way home from the laundry mat at 11:00 at night (Oh, yeah this is where I have to mention that on my way to the laundry mat I was going to drop our rent in the mailbox (late- yes), but forgot and decided to just do it on the way home.) I spoke to myself in Spanish and even was able to recall the preterite and imperfect tenses of verbs right before I stopped to drop the mail in the mailbox and check our mail, which required my getting out of the car. Once out of the car I heard some sort of animal in the ditch across from the cuntry community mailbox area. I got excited that it sounded cattish and thought that perhaps it was Cooper, though I was worried that the mewing sounded wimpy, like he was hurt. For a while I even thought perhaps it was a different sort of animal altogether, but determined it was not Cooper (sadly), but a kitten. Every time I meowed at it, which I do very well, in addition to my Spanish r rolling cat call mah Mamma does, the cat meowed back, but because the cat was in a veritable snake bed of burry, fire anty flora, I decided to run home and get a flashlight and The Future President and her friend to help.

When we were driving back to the mailbox area, there was a tiny tiny orange tabby in the road meowing. As soon as we got out of the car, it fled and I won't go into tremendous detail about all the lengths we went to to try and get the cat, which seemed clearly homeless, but suffice it to say it involved my lifting a thirteen year-old over a barbed wire fence, an underground drainage ditch and a can of tuna... all for naught, as we were not able to come home with the kitten. I allowed my daughter to drive our van back to our house (Hey, it's the country and she's been practicing and annoyingly corrects me on my own driving now.) and despite my not getting home until about 1:30 AM, I had to give up and come home bare-handed. That night I met a very intriguing fellow in my dream with whom I spoke Spanish, even in past tenses, and he was crazy about me (the part of the dream Dr. Therapist and I determined was pertinent- to feel wanted) and was coming to Austin. It was a good dream.

My daughter and son walked down there and tried in the morning and at about 11:00 it occurred to me that not only had that kitten been going without food (which we tried to give it), but even worse it had no water. We went down later and saw that another kitten was dead in the ditch and our little orange guy was meowing from the middle of drainage ditch going under the street, which we could see through in daylight. I sat on the ground on one side of the street, my daughter on the other side, surrounded by waist high grass for quite a while, garnering strange glances from some neighbors getting their mail. Once, I even bent down and just pretended I wasn't there. Two very nice country gentlemen stopped. One suggested we leave it food and water, saying it would be fine, but the tuna we'd left the night before was covered in fire ants when we went back the next day and we told him about the dead kitten. Another guy stopped and said he would run home and grab a (humane) trap he had that we could use.

This whole time I knew the easiest solution was just to have the Genius crawl into the drainage tube and he had thought of that himself by then, but saw as well that though we could see there were no snakes or larger creepy things, there were quite likely spiders. The guy that remained while the other was fetching his trap kept trying to urge the genius in there though, telling him that's what he'd do if he were smaller. The kitten was going to die that day without food and water; it was walking wobbly and everything, so my son did go in a few feet, but thankfully cautious enough to turn back. Anyway, at some point a net got involved and my just sitting and calling it for a very long time on the other side of all that lured it close enough to me that I was able to scoop it into the net. Yea! We had a kitten, which my daughter particularly had been asking for and was miffed Snaggletooth got the bunny when she had been asking for a kitten. So, this kitten was very welcome. It's also helped me think that Cooper's disappearance had a purpose of some sort.

So, now we have a kitten and a bunny living in my daughters' room. The cat has since eaten and pooped and learned from the bunny no less to do so in the cat box. The kitten absolutely adores the bunny, pounces on it and chases it and the bunny is über tolerant. Tonight The Lip Model and I laughed our asses off as we witnessed, seriously, the kitten practicing jumping. It was trying over an over again to hop and then land with both its feet at the same time, even doing the little gymnast trying to nail a landing correction when it got it wrong. It was hilarious. So, plans are developing for the video which will feature the bunny who acts like a cat (he's taken to lying flat on his (or her- we haven't determined yet) belly like a cat in addition to the cat box) and the cat who acts like a bunny, hopping and eating bunny grass stuff. Incidentally, the bunny's starting to take to me and let me approach it to pet it.

Without any more background, here is "The Kitty." I think that maybe TFP is trying to annoy me by naming her that, but she is ultra cute. See for yourself. Here she is contemplating attacking her mentor....

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

Awww! Kitty! Very, very cute. We got one of our cats in a similar manner. People are always dumping animals on our little country road. And by "people" I mean assholes. Yay for you for going to the effort to save the little dude or dudette.

GETkristiLOVE said...

Oh good for you and your persistence. The little tabby is so lucky and way cute - and orange cats are the best if I do say so myself!

Utah Savage said...

Great post and wonderful rescue, great picture, such detail, so perfect, and how many unfinished stories on the "secret site?" Just nagging, I mean, just saying...

Dean Wormer said...

Vortex of cute.

But the rabbit doesn't look happy to see him.

enc said...

That is the cutest thing I've ever seen in my life. I love how they take cues from each other. I'd love to see video of them.

Randal Graves said...

Goddamn is that kitten is obscenely cute. Stop making us feel all mushy and sappy.

Anonymous said...

Good for you! I see plenty of blog fodder in your future.

You know me, I'm a fool for cute. This is adorable.

Blueberry said...

Aaaahhhh!!! Maybe you could call The Kitty "TK" or "TeeKay," which sounds kind of like Tiki, which is a god of sorts... and cats are gods, or at least they think they are...

...they rule in our house anyway.

Looks like he's the "Son of Bun" (providing he's a HE), but that makes a really bad acronym.

Mrs Slocombe said...

I love the fact that it is called the laundry mat: very nice comment on ms Friday's: I'm sure it helped